Dealing with the Inevitable

The Petite Pain's mother knew she wanted to be free to discuss anything and everything with her child.  Many parents and children share nary a thought, nary a feeling.  From a very early age, the Petite Pain was encouraged to have ideas and opinions of her own.  What she chose to share, she shared.  What she didn't choose to share, she kept to herself.  The Petite Pain and her mother would sit at the kitchen table together, talking and listening.  They'd cuddle up together on the living room couch, talking and listening.  They'd stretch out on her parents' bed, talking and listening.

During these conversations, the Petite Pain's mother would describe a challenge that the Petite Pain would have to deal with or would want to deal with as she grew older.  Once the inevitability of the challenge had "sunk in," the two would begin brainstorming.   What would the Petite Pain need to know to meet the challenge successfully?  Would practice sessions be desirable or necessary?  The brainstorming and the actual practice sessions could go on for years before both the Petite Pain and her mother were confident that all would go well.

The Petite Pain's mother always introduced an inevitable like this:  "One of these days, you're going to want to go downtown by yourself."    Now, that particular inevitable surprised the Petite Pain.  She was only  five and had never ever wanted to go downtown by herself.   When she was surprised, she always  responded the same way:  "I will?"   Her mother would answer firmly:  "Oh, yes.  You will.. Definitely."  What would be would be.  "You're going to have a lot to learn.  If we start practicing now, you'll be ready to go when you want to go."

From that point on, the Petite Pain and her mother discussed and practiced what to do on that first trip downtown alone.  The destination would be the children's section of the Main Public Library because the Petite Pain wouldn't have to cross any heavily trafficked streets  to get there.  The Petite Pain practiced buying tickets, counting change, putting both in a deep pocket, so they wouldn't be lost.  She gave the conductor the tickets, got off at the end of the line, led her mother to the children's section of the library, got out a book, and then led her home.  She had to get on the right train, get off at the right stop.  The return trip was more difficult, but the Petite Pain knew what she needed to know.

One Saturday, the Petite Pain wanted to go to the library.  Her mother said, "Why don't you go to the library downtown?"  The Petite Pain said, "Good idea," and off she went on her solo trip downtown.  She was nine.

The Petite Pain went downtown alone before any of her friends knew they'd ever want to go downtown by themselves.  When they first had the idea that a solo trip would be fun, they had to ask.  "Mom, would it be okay if I went downtown by myself?"  Then, the arguing would start.  "But the Petite Pain's ;been going since she was nine."  Their mothers didn't care about the Petite Pain's adventures.